Five GREAT reasons to overcome your fear of networking

I woke up feeling terrified this morning.

I went to sleep feeling scared and miserable last night.

Why?

It’s simply because today I’m attending a networking and learning event, in London.

Yes, the day has finally arrived, and it’s time for Soulful PR Live 2017, organised by the fabulous Janet Murray. The halls of The Trampery are filled with brilliant, warm female entrepreneurs and businesswomen.

Happily, in normal daily life, I’m confident, calm, and always delighted to talk to anyone about the wonders of hypnotherapy and coaching. Unfortunately, I’ve had a difficult week (I’m a human being) and a lot of my old fears and anxieties have been raising their ugly heads.

Feelings of not being good enough, ‘imposter syndrome’, shyness, and social anxiety are all bubbling away. Add to this the fact that I’m an introverted extrovert, so events like this can feel very draining (however good I’m feeling).

I guess you’ll either understand my terror, or you’ll think it strange, maybe even funny, that I could feel this way about a well-organised, friendly and professional event, populated by like-minded souls.

If you do empathise, then perhaps you have too have dreaded a situation that requires you to present and promote yourself, or your business. Perhaps you’ve even avoided such an opportunity.

Which is a great shame, because such an occasion really IS an opportunity, and one I believe you should seize with enthusiasm.

There are three vital reasons for this:

First, making connections is really important, because people do business with people. The truth is that there’s just no substitute for getting out there and meeting real human beings, putting faces to names, shaking hands, chatting over a coffee, sharing a laugh, and forging a professional relationship. Heck, you might even make a friend! No branding or email in the world can compete with a real working relationship, or the memory of a shared experience.

You’re an amazing human being, and there are other amazing human beings out there ready to meet and connect with you.

Second, every time you do something that scares you, you will boost your self-confidence. Nothing will make you grow faster as a person – and as a professional – than overcoming your fears and doubts. Ideally, you should attempt one such challenge every single day. I know it can be daunting, especially if you are feeling less than your best, but I have some tips for how to do this, and how to make a habit of it so that being courageous becomes second nature.

success sunrise shutterstock_509482420-2

Third, if you don’t go, your fears and doubts will actually INCREASE! Avoidance is the favoured strategy of the fearful, but in fact it adds weight and credence to phobia, because it reinforces our belief that the avoided stimulus is awful. Studies have shown that the fear of pain is much worse than actual pain endured, and this is also true for any activities that we dread. I’m sure you know what it’s like if you’ve got to have a difficult conversation: nine times out of ten you feel worse BEFORE you make that call than you do afterwards.

Fourth, you’ll gain something new (and often unexpected) from every experience of networking. Whether you pick up some amazing tips, develop wisdom, make a vital new contact, learn a trick of the trade, or just have way more fun than you could have imagined, every new experience and encounter leaves you smarter. And that will help you to grow in confidence, making the next one easier.

Fifth, and possibly most importantly, the world needs your magic, your unique gifts, your contribution. If you stay at home, or hide in your office, and do not get out there and let people know what you’ve got, you’re doing yourself (and everyone else) a huge disservice. You were not born to hide your light. You are here to shine! To sparkle, and dazzle! So take a deep breath, and smile, and let’s do this.

So then, just HOW do we do it?

I use positive visualisation with self-hypnosis on days like this, so that I can see myself walking tall, smiling with confidence, and enjoying the experience of meeting so many amazing people.

Yoga, meditation, keeping my blood-sugar constant, breathing properly and taking a few strategic ‘time-outs’ will all also help to boost my confidence and maintain my positive energy.

It’s not always easy, but I have ALWAYS found it to be worth the effort of overcoming fear and doubt.

There can be no courage without vulnerability, so the fact that we’re scared is what makes us brave. Using hypnotherapy and cognitive behavioural techniques, I have learned to manage my anxieties and emotions, and you can too.

Practising courage and confidence over fear and self-doubt can become a habit, and it is one that will help you to succeed in life, no matter what challenges come your way.

I hope that by sharing this, I’ve helped you to feel braver. It’s my mission to help you to overcome your challenges and learn to shine, today and every day.

If you would love to know more about HOW to feel braver and more confident, then you can look forward to my next post, 5 ways to shine at your next event, or you can contact me at The Seymour Clinic. I’d love to help you!

Emma x

 

How it works

The whole process starts (and ends) with you. You are in control, always.

Making the decision to make a change is the first step, and actually, often the hardest. So once you’ve decided that you re ready to change something in your life, you’re on your journey. Congratulations!

You can get in touch in several ways (see Contact). We usually start with an informal phone or online consultation. This typically takes 10-20 minutes, and it’s free, with no obligation.

If you and I then agree that I can help you, we’ll arrange an appointment for a first proper session. Sessions can be in-person at our Bournemouth clinic, or online via Zoom or Skype.

During the first session, we’ll get a really clear understanding of your situation and discuss the best way forward. Together we’ll work out how many sessions will best serve you, and then I’ll create your personalised therapy or coaching programme. Most clients benefit from 3-12 sessions, usually one per week.

My approach is solution-focused, so we’ll be working together to get you where you want to be, as soon as feels comfortable for you. There is no rush, but equally, why hang about? My aim is to see you feeling positive, confident, motivated and ready to rock, and this usually happens within just a few weeks.

I can’t promise it will all be easy, but it really is that simple.

Take a leap!

Thanks to Thomas Jefferson for the wise words. If you would like help with a problem, or if you need some guidance to develop your skills and work towards a better life, please take a leap of faith and call, text or email Emma at The Seymour Clinic.

We’ll be delighted to help you achieve things you’ve never had, by doing things you’ve never done.

Emma x

Always follow your dreams

Always follow your dreams

IMG_1640
So, the annual Bournemouth Air Festival is in full swing this weekend (despite the unpredictable weather). I think it seems like a very good time to honour the memory and respect the sage advice of the late Flight Lieutenant Jon Egging, aka ‘Eggman’, aka ‘Red 4’ of the famous Red Arrows, who tragically died here in 2011.

I love this memorial to Eggman: named ‘Blue Skies’, it soars from the clifftop, out towards the sparkling sea. And engraved there is the message: “Always follow your dreams”. Wise words, and a beautiful sculpture. It’s a testimony to a courageous life, fully lived. 

So please, take a tip from this truly daring soul, and follow your dreams today. Here’s to you, sir x

Luminous beings are we…

…and great wisdom from Yoda this is.

Yes, there’s a lot we can learn from everyone’s favourite old timer.

Yoda is the philosopher-warrior-teacher-guru of Star Wars, who coaches young Luke Skywalker through the frustrating experience of learning to become a Jedi and use the Force.

For me, using the force is similar to understanding prana in yoga, or chi, or using hypnosis and mindfulness to clear the mind of noise. If we direct our energies towards that which we want, rather than focusing on our fears and anger, it opens up a world of possibility.

Yoda knows that if you want to achieve something, you must first believe that you can.

These are some of my favourite examples of his philosophy and teachings:

“Do or do not… There is no try.”

“Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose.”

Already know you that which you need.

The dark side clouds everything. Impossible to see the future is.

“Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship.”

“Luminous beings are we…not this crude matter.”

“Ready are you? What know you of ready? For eight hundred years have I trained Jedi. My own counsel will I keep on who is to be trained. A Jedi must have the deepest commitment, the most serious mind. This one a long time have I watched. All his life has he looked away… to the future, to the horizon. Never his mind on where he was. Hmm? What he was doing. Hmph. Adventure. Heh. Excitement. Heh. A Jedi craves not these things. You are reckless.”

“Truly wonderful, the mind of a child is.”

“Always pass on what you have learned.”

“Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will.”

“Yes, a Jedi’s strength flows from the Force. But beware of the dark side. Anger, fear, aggression; the dark side of the Force are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight. If once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will, as it did Obi-Wan’s apprentice.”

“Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them do not. Miss them do not. Attachment leads to jealously. The shadow of greed, that is.”

“Always in motion is the future.”

“To answer power with power, the Jedi way this is not. In this war, a danger there is, of losing who we are.”

Happy Star Wars Day, young Jedis, and May the fourth be with you!

Emma x

yoda-wisdom
Fear is the path to the dark side.

yoda luminous beings are weyoda - named must your fear beyoda - mistake you have madeyoda-quote-ready-are-youyoda and lukeyoda - you must unlearn... you will knowyoda - beliefyoda yogi

 

It’s the truth…

Quote - if you want something youve never had...

Appointments available next week… starting Tuesday 12th April

Hello everyone,

I hope you are keeping well and happy.

We’ve recently had a few therapy and coaching appointments become available for next week, starting Tuesday 12th April.

So if you are ready for change, come and see us!

Do you want to stop smoking, prepare for exams, lose weight for the summer, build your confidence, learn to relax, or just change your life in any positive way? If so, give us a call on 07968 120661 or you can email me directly with any questions at emma.seymour@gmail.com.

You can come to the Bournemouth clinic in person, or you can have an online session, which is so convenient that many clients prefer it even when they are local.

Believe in yourself, and you can achieve anything you really want.

Yours, in positivity
Emma xx